I felt like a bad aunt. I had talked to G and L about the possibility of a new job since November. And my gut told me after the first interview that I had a very good chance of landing this new job. It was a great opportunity for me. However, it would mean no more Fridays with G and L. I’d just have to make a little more effort to carve out time for G and L after the first of the year.
It still brings tears to my eyes when I think about MY day with G, and then both G and L, over the course of the year and couple of months between October 2010 and December 2011. When each of those kiddos was born, I vowed to be an aunt whom they would know well and be able to come to for anything. I am very fortunate to live only 30 miles away from them, so it’s not like I was never going to see them again. But yet it would be different.
Then I thought of all of the milestones yet to come, and how I needed to brace myself for those. I could continue be a strong presence in their lives without my own day. While I felt selfish at the moment, the tables will turn soon enough when they are older and making decisions in their own lives.
I thought about all of the families who are living hundreds or thousands miles apart. And I thought about those who I am close to whom I don’t see all of the time. It’s about the effort and quality time.
And it was time to start a new chapter, as painful as it might be. I needed to find my career path again, as I felt I had been floating around since I left Victory Enterprises in early 2010.
My sister and brother-in-law have endlessly thanked me for babysitting their kids. I always tell them I enjoy it, and even that is an understatement. I learned so much from my Fridays with G and L. They inspired me to start blogging about them. They reminded me how trivial my problems were when I saw their faces light up. While I didn’t cry as much as I thought I would when I drove home that night, I dreaded bringing this chapter of my blog to a close. So I procrastinated with these final posts. I didn’t want to type and cry at the same time.
Then I realized I had all of this new material for a new chapter: “Mel, G, and L”. A NEW CHAPTER. When one door closes, another opens.